High Speed Lane

The social activism week is being celebrated through the district and the Active Theater group is staging a theme play...

High Speed Lane

(Curtain rises. A young fellow is seen sitting across a posh table in a very small, very clean and bright room.)

Shrink: Welcome! Welcome my friend, what brings you here?

(Happy: Who doesn't welcome a ready-made mint? I have paid twenty five hundred for this welcome!)

Happy: A referral from Muskaan's Asha Kiran!

Shrink: Do you mean the one at Vijay Chowk?

Happy: Righto!

Shrink: Hmm, interesting! Have you successfully undergone their program?

(Happy: You find that interesting, are you an expert at dealing with addicts?)

Happy: Well, they refused to take me in in the very first place :(

(Shrink: What type of a case is this, looks confident, speaks perfectly well yet sounds creepy :O)

Shrink: Oh really! I never heard them doing anything like this before. Were you given any reason being sent to me?

Happy: Not initially, but I asked for it. Are you willing to hear the truth :P

Shrink: Why not, I am dying to know.

Happy: Brace for the revelation then! They said you are the most psycho shrink in the town and would kinda suit me ;)

Shrink: I think we will kinda get along well in that case :)

Happy: :D 

Shrink: Now tell me Happy, why were you so secretive while fixing the appointment? 

Happy: Well, you see... 

Shrink: Well, strange as it might sound, I am no MRI scanner. You will have to tell me at least something. Let's shift to a better room to talk freely. 

(Happy is led into a bigger and cozier room with easy chairs. He is offered the first serving of Pepsi which is not spiked as per ethics. Conversation resumes after a brief pause.) 

Happy: Doc, I am in this weirdo situation. And I will be very uncomfortable if my situation is known to any third party. Can I trust that nothing of this is being recorded?

(Shrink: Oh you are teaching me new tricks!)

Shrink: You can completely trust me that all of what we discuss here dies within these four walls.

(Shrink: Given a choice, I would have happily disclosed everything about you, but I haven't been afforded that privilege; ethics, you know!) 

Shrink: I am waiting to 'see' this 'weirdo situation' :) 

(Happy's balloon of thoughts was waiting to burst out...

Happy: Thanks to drugs, I know what's heaven, what's the state of pure bliss, how it feels when the skull becomes weightless, soft and porous and soaks in the sweet nectar which every single cell of the brain relishes with utmost pleasure, the world gets slower, enchanting music props up in the background, the kingdom of brain expands into a fantasy garden filled with dancing giant fireflies and every single atom of your existence starts gyrating to their tunes and then the soul gets liberated!

As you plop back into the muddy waters of realty, you crave like a madman for this ecstasy, every single atom of your existence revolts against even feather-light rational thoughts trying to auto-pilot you towards Asha Kiran!

...and it did burst with a loud pop and a painful twitch of the body!)

(Shrink: And they instead of letting you land there, divert you here! By the way, you tempt me to do drugs and that makes a classic case of hunter getting hunted.)

Shrink: I can see, you have been through a hell lot of pain and I can very well empathize with you. Tell me more. Did friends get you into this holy mess?

Happy: That's the catch in my story. I can bet my friends are holier than any living holy men. It was a doc who drove me to this high speed lane :(

Shrink: Let me understand this clearly. Do you mean to say that a genuine doc, a registered medical practitioner? :O

Happy: Yeah.
Shrink: *#$%  ?@$#%&  ^#@*

Happy: Please don't be so harsh on him. He kinda did me a favor. I could not be administered anesthesia. He spared me the horrors of surgery by sedating me. So you get it now, he gave me those sedatives in the operation theater.

(Shrink's eyes are popping out in disbelief while Happy appears to have calmed down.)

 

Shrink: So, so when were you operated upon? I mean for long have you been taking those sedatives?

(Happy gets agitated.) 

Happy: Are you kidding doc? You should be able to guess that! Anyways, I am not in touch with any of them anymore. It's just that the sweet taste still continues to linger in my brain, I can still see those fireflies. A good company and strong will keeps me away from it, but it feels like a torture that tramples my psyche.

(Shrink is visibly relieved and the sweat drops evaporate from his forehead though Happy fails to notice that)

Shrink: Hmm...that's a good start that you are able to maintain the distance. Let me deduce, you never had that stuff of your own, else you couldn't have been sitting here articulating so well. Is that so?

Happy: That was straight from an MRI scanner :)

Shrink: Thank you :)

Happy: So what next?

Shrink: Next? Next...yes of course next you have to be saved from the trampling torture. Lemme see how...

(Bullet trains of thoughts start colliding against each other inside the tracks of Shrink's mind)

Happy: ???

Shrink: Happy, I promised to keep our talks behind a permanent veil. May I ask you for a promise in return?

Happy: Hmm...(imitating Shrink) lemme see...well yes!

Shrink: You are a very determined young fellow. Promise me that you would stop thinking of the events that landed you in the OT. It will break the series of thoughts leading to the memory of those sedatives. The less you are reminded of the state of ecstasy, the less you will be tempted to try it again, the lesser tortured you will feel to suppress that temptation.

Happy: Wow! That's quite uncomplicated, quite simple. (Getting up and hugging the shrink)Thank you doc, thank you, thank you :')

(Happy leaves the clinic feeling quite transformed. The shrink is still in shock at his success as all that he said was a mere desperate attempt to save his own face. Then suddenly, he starts jumping with joy and thinks aloud)  

Shrink: Yes, I have done it, yes, I have finally put my English degree to a good use! Being an agony aunt, I mean uncle, was just so simple. Placebo theory does work indeed! I am all set at earning a handsome fees till they call me a quack again and kick me out of here :D

(Curtain)